LIVE and (A)LIVE

Priya Sakhi....


Hi Sakhi... I am alive...
It has been a while since I shared my thoughts with you..
Is it because I am in a state of limbo? Too many people passing away... troubles.. worries.... heat!

Makes me pause and think ... about life, about my natyam.. purpose of continuing in a field that has become highly competitive.  But which profession in not? There is competition, aggression and politics in any field.. in any relationship.

I need to snap out of this wave of self-pity... cliche, but there are many who are worse off... count my blessings---count them one by one.... my mind wanders to school, the carol singing.... the sero gang (one day, Priya Sakhi, I will tell you about this wonderful gang).

Then I come across some old photographs..   serendipity... my kindergarten photographs... photographs of my teenage--- I was slimmer then, younger then ...things that were locked in the inner recess of my mind, memories just come gushing out like a waterfall . Some bring a tear to my eye.. some photographs make me laugh.

The sounds of incessant laughter, the bus rides with my friend Subha... the innocence... the way our gang used to wait for the Natya-Sangeetha December season... the way we used to prepare the schedules of different sabha-s and the kutcheri-s. There were no ready programme reckoners then.

My niece Manasi just posted on facebook saying that `life was simpler then'. True.

There was no internet, no mobiles, no facebook, no blogs even...
But friendships were deeper, family ties were stronger, life was...

But wait... I am not against technology... love and enjoy every thing it offers us. But are we in control of our lives?  Mobile phones... computers.. tabs.. I-pads.. tablet... are they the means of communication or are they the end?
How many saw the orange moon yesterday? How many of us listen to the parrots, the sound of the crows? Do we see butterflies? No not on the net, dear Sakhi,   but live.
Live and live--- one sense it means `to be alive' and in the other it means ` in the current.'.. but ...

How alive are we now? Is it about this moment? life now? or what was...  or what will be...
 Too many questions for me...

I  happily hum..
" Smaradhinumam.... Balya sahayam....."